IMAGINARY FRIENDS
Does your child tell you about a hen called Peggy who has become his friend, or does he explain that Mike, his playmate, doesn’t eat spaghetti?
You’re wondering what to make of these companions you can’t see, who seem perfectly real to your offspring?
Don’t panic, studies on this subject show that 65% of children under the age of 7, most often only children or elders, have had an imaginary friend at one time or another, and that these usually disappear around the age of 8 or 9, to be replaced by real friends.
According to psychologist Patricia Serin, an imaginary friend generally appears between the ages of 3 and 6 for 30% of children.
These psychologically healthy children describe this character perfectly, sometimes in great detail, and recount their shared conversations and games.
Real for the child, this companion has no objective basis and appears for an average of six months.
Between the ages of 6 and 11, the imaginary friend may serve to compensate for uncertainty or loneliness, or to express a fertile imagination.
The latter can sometimes appear following a sibling birth or any other family event that proves more or less disturbing.
Sometimes the imaginary character continues to exist and grows up with the child, advising him or her on how to behave at particular events.
The imaginary character may still be present in adolescence, whether for a socially-adapted, imaginative youngster or a more solitary individual.
Their presence during this period of identity-building enables the individual to confide in them, as they are ready to accept anything.
In fact, it’s accepted that an imaginary friend is part of the normal process of child development,
It’s a kind of double of the self, allowing the child to project his or her desires and concerns, and providing a reassuring presence.
This stage in the child’s psychic development demonstrates his creativity and intelligence, as he relies on this creation to control his world.
However, it’s worth asking questions when:
- this character becomes too invasive
- its absence causes anxiety attacks,
- becomes an obsession, or
- when this imaginary companion is used to lie, manipulate or excuse wrongdoing.
